Anger management is a popular and necessary topic in today's world. In dealing with difficult people, in our family relationships, or in facing marriage problems, we simply do not know how to deal with anger!
When dealing with anger, we may wonder, "Am I right?" or "How can I make myself understood?" Some of our relationships can be said to be the very definition of conflict! Lacking conflict resolution skills, and out of a sense of powerlessness in our circumstances, we become angry.
In the book "Anger", Gnani Purush (embodiment of Self knowledge) Dada Bhagwan offers the ultimate anger management techniques in the form of spiritual conflict resolution strategies. He gives numerous solutions for dealing both with our own anger, and the anger of others. In addition, Dadashri offers spiritual advice on how to handle difficult people, anger management tips, and relationship tips.
Excerpt:
Anger is a weakness, but people think of it as strength. The one who does not get angry possesses more inner strength than the one who gets angry.
A person usually becomes angry when things do not go his way, when he is misunderstood by another person, or when his viewpoints clash with another's viewpoints. We become angry when we are accused of being wrong, when we think we are right. Our perception causes us to believe that we are right. According to the other person, he believes that he is right. Because we do not know how to reason and because, we have no foresight or intuition, we become angry.
When we are insulted, we become angry. We become angry when we incur a loss. In protecting our pride or our greed, we experience anger. If one is to become free from pride and greed, he must have awareness (spiritual). Say for instance, your son-in-law broke your china tea set, would you not control your temper? If your servant were to do the same thing, should you not control your temper in this situation as well? Our reactions vary in different situations (from situation to situation).
Anger can only dissolve if one understands that those who do wrong by him are merely his nimits, (people instrumental in delivering the effects of his past karma) and that what he is experiencing is the result of his karmas from his previous life.
We should be aware of our anger at all times. When someone is hurt by our anger, we should be remorseful, ask him or her for forgiveness, and vow never to get angry again. It is necessary for us to do this. We must do this because the person we become angry towards will be hurt; he will harbor a grudge and bind vengeance against us, and therefore, in our next life, we will have to suffer the consequences.
When parents become angry with their children or when a guru becomes angry with his disciples, they bind punya (merit karma). This is because their aim is to improve their children and disciples respectively. If one were to become angry out of selfishness, he would then bind paap (bad karma). This is the teaching of the Enlightened Ones.
Anger, the subject dealt with in this book, is the most troublesome and overt of all inner human weaknesses. It is discussed extensively for clear understanding. It is our sincere hope that the readers will find this helpful in their endeavor to free themselves from the severe grip of anger.