Welcome to the entertaining world of poet, enigma and serial adulterer, Mr If. You've never read anything like this before. You never will again.
I don’t want people to think I’m miserable,
Just because I’m miserable.
I don’t want people to say, stop complaining,
There are people starving and living on the streets,
While you’re sitting on your couch,
Eating your beans on toast
Like you’re the Earl of fucking Wessex.
I want people to say, this fucker’s got a point.
Let’s not discriminate.
He has as much right to be unhappy
As anyone else.
Good clean fun
She was a mother of three. Her husband was at work and her kids were downstairs. It
was like a scene from Confessions of a...